Linda’s Writings on Everything

I remember Rome about 2,000 years ago. I went back, in time, to see a line of Roman soldiers marching. They looked so tiny, compared to me!
Then I realized, that in our modern culture of quick and easy food availability, we naturally grow taller when we eat enough nutritious food. It’s easy for us modern Americans to forget that there was a time when every able-bodied adult had to hunt, farm, or gather food. No refrigerators, no microwaves, no take-out pizzas. You were in touch with the life-cycle of food, from the ground to the harvest. If you were a hunter, you took the lives of animals for food and shelter, and you had to skin and dismember the dead animal before you could cook and eat the meat.
I know from experience, that there’s a connection between the food I consume, and my health, energy, weight, and quality of sleep that I get. Is it any surprise, therefore, that the food I eat is connected to my sex desire?
I find that my sex desire increases whenever I decrease my food, and/or totally give up “empty calories”. We all know what “empty calories” are: white bread, refined white sugar, soft drinks, take-out pizzas, McDonald’s anything, etc. My sex desire also increases whenever I increase my level of exercise, over a sustained period of time. If I manage to decrease my food intake, give up “empty calories”, and increase my exercise, I start to lose weight. (I have always had issues with overweight, and I’d like to rid myself of this).
Many Americans join me in weighing too much. I see more overweight people now than I ever have at any other time in our history. I look at movies and rock videos from the 70s, and I notice that people in general are far slimmer in those old movies and videos, than they are today. McDonald’s portions used to be much smaller. Coincidence!
People, it’s not that hard to cook and eat good, fresh food. Fresh green salads full of crunchy, raw vegetables and homemade salad dressing. Hot soups brimming with fresh vegetables, grains, and a tasty, homemade broth. Pizza you make yourself, starting with fresh crust, or if lazy, whole grain bread slices topped with tomato paste, cheese, and toppings of your choice. Stick it in that toaster oven for 10 minutes at 350 degrees. Yum!!
Many people have overwhelmingly busy lives. Work, school, the daily commute via private car on clogged freeways. So they say they are too tired to cook. (I know how that feels). And they go for McDonald’s, or Round Table, or other empty calories.
Believe me, eating fresh, homemade food you make yourself, or that somebody you love makes for you, will GIVE you more energy. Also, taking the time for daily exercise. God is encouraging me to take up daily yoga! Yoga has been around for 1,000’s of years. And no wonder, it really makes me feel better.
Your physical health directly affects your sexual desire. As do your mental, emotional, and spiritual health. So many of us have survived broken relationships, rape, sexual abuse, trauma, dysfunctional childhoods and families.
Did you know that as a woman, sex when you are not in the mood, or penis-vagina intercourse before you are totally willing and ready, can cause a yeast infection? I make a contract with myself. Never again will I allow a man to put his lingham (penis) in my yoni (vagina) before I am totally willing and ready. If he’s that impatient to put the key inside the lock, then he’s going to have to respect the needs and desires of the Keeper of the Temple. And my body is a temple. All who would enter must utterly respect and love me, the Keeper of the Temple.
My great desire is to be a sexual healer. Meaning, I wish to counsel men, women, couples, and yes, even Polyamorous Tribes in everything from how to heal their sexual wounds, to how to repair a suffering relationship. Anybody who has survived a rape or sexual and physical abuse, may well have extra challenges when intimately involved with their lover, spouse, or partner.
Yoni massage is a great sexual healing tool for the woman who’s survived rape or other sexual invasions. This is also true for the woman who’s survived repeated painful sexual intercourse. There’s a way to go about it. You must both set up sacred space. A private place where neither of you is in a hurry. You must really allow a lot of time for this. Uninterrupted time. Being in a rush is very anti-sexual. The woman lies back, and her partner massages her yoni, inside and out, with great respect and tenderness. But only when she says it’s alright for him (or her) to do so.
And if the receiver of the yoni massage comes up with tears, screams of anger, or “flash-backs” (visuals of traumatic sexual memories), just hold her and love her. Let her determine if, when, and how much of a yoni massage you give her. I know from experience that this really works. Intercourse was horrendously painful for me for years, to the point of being nearly impossible! Until I heard about, then found a willing lover to give me a yoni massage. It took us several sessions. But finally, I was able to have totally pleasurable and relaxed sexual intercourse-for the first time in my life. When I was 20, intercourse was incredibly painful. Probably because I wasn’t enjoying myself and the very first guy didn’t take his time or listen to my needs and desires.
I forgive the ignorant young woman that I once was. I forgive the clumsy, traumatized man who did this to me. I remember when I started to let go of my anger at this man, after nearly 2 decades of no sex at all, the mist came out of my eyes, and my eyesight literally shifted!

The real cure for Erectile Dysfunction, lies in a man getting his health together. I have heard that being very overweight can cause ED in a man. Compulsive overeaters are people who use food as anesthesia or pain-killer. Typically, they’ve tried every diet. They’ve starved themselves, binged, driven hours in the dead of night to find a store open with “just the right food”, eaten things that were stale, frozen, burnt, or dangerously spoiled. You hear stories like this in many Overeaters Anonymous meetings across the country. Overeaters Anonymous is a Fellowship based on the 12 Steps of Alcoholics Anonymous. They change the words “alcohol” and “alcoholic” to “food” and “compulsive eater”. OA also welcomes Anorexics and Bulemics. Anorexics often get dangerously thin to the point of bad health. Bulemics tend to eat food, then throw it back up, repeatedly.
My experience with compulsive overeating is that it’s a problem on three levels: physical, emotional, and spiritual. And that a thorough working of the 12 Steps, with an OA sponsor, plus regular attendance at OA meetings (when possible) and coming up with a nutritious, moderate “food plan” are the solution. Along with the willingness to be open-minded, honest, and to give it a real try.
So, I can say for certain that our choices in food and drink definitely impact our sexuality! Weight and physical appearance can and do have an impact on our self-esteem. Confidence in and a healthy respect for yourself, are a big part of our sexual attraction, and can motivate us to go for the kind of life we really want, and not accept being stuck in places or relationships that are detrimental to us and our well-being, as well as happiness.
Sexuality and how we choose to express it, and whom with, are a big part of our happiness. Maybe sex isn’t everything, anymore than money. But sex and money both run on currents of energy.
And our sex lives plus our finances are definitely affected by our deepest, most hidden core beliefs about ourselves! Who we are, what we deserve, what we think and how we feel about the world, people in general, men, women, ourselves, our bodies and intelligence!

All these ideas bear further development. This could be the basis for a series of articles, or even an entire book! Why not?